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Ducky: Welcome, welcome... Please take a seat; it's nice to finally interview you Saldamontee.. I must say however, you look more succulent in person.. What's the secret?
Saldamontee: .... (Whispers) I'll tell you after the interview.. Don't want everyone knowing..
Ducky: oHHHhhh... I see, you don't want to reveal the crabby patty secret formula; that's okay.. I know how to hold a secret.. Anyways, before we talk about your art, and your website, as well as everything else you got planned, I think we should address the elephant in the room... Isn't it weird to fake an interview?
Saldamontee:
What would an artist be, if they didn't have a grandiose sense of self importance? Besides, I think it's pretty normal to have conversation with yourself, this is no different then a diary...
(Shut up Shut up THE VOICES ARENT REAL...
THEY MUST NEVER FIND OUT)
Ducky: Diaries are for sissys.. I had higher hopes for you..
Saldamontee: THATS UNCALLED FOR!
Ducky: I agree, but who made me do it?... That's what I thought.. Now them, let's get to the meat and potatoes.. Who are your biggest artistic influences?
Saldamontee: Umm... I don't really have much influences.. Maybe subconsciously I do, but the ones I know of are mostly musicians.. I originally wanted to be a musician, before I randomly bought paint supplies... Umm.. And I was like damn, you know what? I'm pretty good at it, so here we are.. Umm, I grew up in a rural area in Texas, and I just wasn't exposed to art that much as a kid, so I'm mostly self taught. Although I guess that depends on your definition, cause I haven't improved my art abilities since Pre-K.. Soo, I haven't really been taught anything
Ducky: What about poetry?
Saldamontee: Well most of my influences are authors, not poets.. I grew up reading a lot of Charles Dickens, but the only poet I've read until recently was Dr Suess.. Dont get me wrong, GREEN EGGS AND HAM is still one of my favor-
Ducky: AHHHUUUMMMMM
Saldamontee: ... You good?
Ducky: OOooo nothing... It's just that 1 fish 2 fish exists...
Saldamontee: ... You're a duck, of course you're gonna like a book about fish.. Green eggs and ham is a more philo
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Ducky: NUMMUMUMMMUMMMUMMMMM.... GAAAWD DAMN THIS FISH TASTE SO GOOD!
Saldamontee: ..
Ducky: I'm actually a goose, not a duck by the way... Just cause I sound like the RFK Jr version of Donald Duck doesn't mean I'm a duck you silly billy
Saldamontee: My bad man, it's the name Ducky brah, cmmon now, you can't fault me..
Ducky: OOoo I can, and will... I don't even want to interview you anymore.. Not only did you Miss identify my species... You also think Green Eggs and Ham is better the 1 fish 2 fish...
Saldamontee: How can I redeem myself?
Ducky: Give me 25 cents
Saldamontee: You're so shameless
Ducky: No no no.... You're soooo shameless... HEHEHE
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